Do you ever think of yourself as a role model?
That can be a hard way to see yourself—especially if you didn’t grow up with clear mentors or examples to follow. And yet, modeling is something God calls all of us to, and in a unique way, He calls parents to within their households.
Modeling is foundational to discipleship. That truth can feel heavy—almost crushing—until we remember this: we are not holding ourselves up as the example. We are holding up Jesus. As His followers, our direction is set by Him. Our hope is found in Him. Our boast is not in ourselves or our own righteousness, but in His.
That encouragement has been especially clear to me recently. Our older kids were playing a game where they pretended to be “mom” and “dad.” They mimicked our tone, gestures, words, instructions, and commands—hushing, correcting, working, cooking, cleaning, emailing, texting. They found it hilarious. We, of course, did now. But we did find it revealing. It was one of those moments that makes you think, “Do I really sound like that?”
It was a reminder: our children are watching. They are copying. They are receiving from us—whether we realize it or not.
When we think about family discipleship, we have to start with modeling. We cannot pass on what we do not possess or practice. And it’s that practice part that can be hard.
Over this winter storm, I’ve been thumbing through a book called Life in the Negative World. One line practically jumped off the page: Do you really believe it? The question behind it is simple—and searching: Do your actions line up with what you say you believe?
Most of us could answer basic questions about our faith clearly and biblically. But if we’re honest, our actions often tell a different story. Our routines, commitments, schedules, and habits can quietly contradict what we claim matters most.
So what about family discipleship? Do we really believe it’s a priority? On paper, yes. But do our lives reflect that belief?
As our world continues to shift, we will face pressures that will reveal if we believe what we say we do. If our faith is merely preference, convenience, or tradition, it won’t hold—not for us or for our children.
That question—Do you really believe it?—is worth sitting with.
The other winter to-do I’ve spent time on is sorting through my parents’ bookshelves. Ironically, they’re full of Christian parenting books, conference materials, devotionals, and strategies. I’ve smiled at how many resources they’ve invested in. And while I don’t remember or recall much of it, here’s what I do remember. Their character. Their marriage. Their church community. That modeling is what stayed with me. That’s what I now get to pass on to my own children.
Resources matter, and we should be so grateful for the absolute abundance of them that we have—but let’s not miss the basics – being Christians in front of our children. Enjoying life in Christ. Cherishing God’s Word. Worshiping with the church. Relying on the Spirit. Practicing what we say we believe. Walking the journey of discipleship alongside them. They need guides, and God has seen fit to make that you! As a church, we want to encourage one another in this shared calling. We’ll be talking more about family discipleship this Sunday, and then taking a deeper dive at our Family Discipleship Pathway Training on February 15. We hope you’ll join us for the journey! In the meantime—keep copying Christ. That never gets old to His Father. And when your modeling falters, look again to Christ, who never does.
